1. |
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2. |
Jedi Mickey
03:04
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Jedi Mickey
by Marc Gunn and Andrew McKee
A long time ago, a tugboat faraway.
Mickey whistled out a tune while bouncing away
He turned color after one too many drinks
Then called up Lucas saying, “Haha! Dude... your writing stinks!”
When Mickey sobered up, he called the board to plan,
"I've had a vision, a lightsaber in my hand
We'll make Star Wars as we wish upon a star
And will do it far better with a story by Pixar. Haha!"
[to the tune When you Wish upon a Star]
When the mouse wants your franchise
He'll start off licensing for rides.
If you're tired and you need some cash
He'll buy from you......
One part mouse and one part duck
One part Jedi and formulaic luck
A Wookie on my right and a Goofy one on my left
Merging these two companies... is the big test
There's a star destroyer shaped like a mushroom house
The Beagle boys stand before a Sith Lord mouse
While far away a Jedi Mouse stares into space
The three moons of Tatooine replaced... by Mickey's face
Mickey meets Minnie. The force is strong with her.
He lays a kiss on her, and the fans all hurl
Minnie is his sister and that folks is a shame
Our love for those mice will never... be the same
Mickey stabs the Sith. The dark mouse disappears
Wherever there's one Sith Lord, another will appear
A duck steps forward with a cloak as black as ink
With Jedi mice and ducks, I'll need... a stronger drink.
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3. |
The Prettiest Hobbit
02:29
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I'll tell Belladonna
‘neath the Party Tree
Let's have fun
Come dance with me
If she won't dance
Then I'll ask Daisy
We'll skip til the sun
Comes up over the trees
* Jump up and down
Let your teeth gleam
Shout your love now 1-2-3
Sing a song down on one knee
She's the prettiest hobbit
You've ever seen
The prettiest hobbit
You've ever seen
The moon looks down
On our hungry cheer
Let's raid old Mungo's
Mushroom field
If we lose our way
‘Neath a cloudy night
We'll chase young coneys
Til the broad daylight
We'll laugh and we'll eat
Our honey cakes
As we roll in the grass
Down by the lake
The swan calls out
“Go home my friends”
To the Party Tree
We'll start again
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4. |
Lady of the Lake
03:37
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5. |
Zombie Love Song
03:00
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I'm in a graveyard. There is no moon.
Something's shuffling about like rats on a tomb;
And it's creeping me out.
I've watched too many horror films lately.
So I walk faster, trying to get out
Of an Evil Dead flick or to just laugh out loud
But here comes this girl
And she's too into to be living.
Bridge
You know you're a zombie
And I'm feeling, oh so wrong,
It's just like a lyric,
Voltaire sings in his songs.
Chorus:
Lost in the blood of somebody's brains
That my new love is eating today.
Don't know how it happened,
Never thought that I'd fall for a zombie.
Then she moves close, I hope to cuddle me tight,
But instead of a kiss she just tries to bite me.
There's a look in her eye,
The one that is still in its socket.
Bridge
I wish that you'd hold me
Instead of eating me like steak.
You've got zombie friends.
So a threesome might be great.
Chorus
Bridge
You put all the feelings
In necrophilia
Would you please stop the biting
Cause I think that you're the one.
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6. |
I Will Not Sing Along
05:04
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I will not sing along
Keep your stupid song
We're the audience,
It's you we came to see
You're not supposed to train us
You're supposed to entertain us.
So get to work and leave me be.
When you go out to a play
Do the actors turn and say,
“Alright, everyone together say my line”
But folk singers get away
With this practice every day
Because they think you people've got no spines
Well it's time to stand and fight
And defend your basic right
To be quiet, any time you choose
When the kumbayahs begin,
It's not crime and it's no sin
To stand up and holler, “I REFUSE!”
Does a trucker pass the buck
And say, “Let's all drive me truck.”
Does a surgeon holler, “Everybody cut!”
But folk singers all expect
For you to drop your self-respect
And howl like some demented nut
It's a big folk singer thing
To say, “everybody sing!”
It's supposed to show our camaraderie
Well, the odds are pretty strong,
That I'm paid to do this song
So why should you do my job for free [I just ask you]
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7. |
Front Porch Waltz
02:42
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8. |
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We're the Race of Men
Conquer valleys and glens
We build huge towers in the sky.
We're strong and we're bold,
Though it be or it be cold
We'll fight everyone till we die.
Oh, we'll never give up the mountain
As long as hope remains
And you will never see
A race as important as we…
We're the race of Dwarves
In dark caverns we forge
And shape the ore that we mine.
We're stout with beards
But give us a beer,
And we'll drink to the gold that we find.
Oh, we'll never give up the mountain
As long as there's money to be made.
And you will never see,
A race as important as we….'re
We're the race of Elves
In forests we dwell
At one with earth and the sky.
We're the race first born
And our only concern
Is how close to our gardens you lie.
Oh, we'll never give up the mountain
At least until our time is done.
And you will never see,
A race as old as we….'re
We're the race of Ents
And we're what was meant
When they said there are shepherd's to trees.
We've been stuffy and slow
Since our women left home
And many have fallen to sleep.
But we'll never give up the mountain.
Our trees are there to defend.
And you will never see
A race as old as the trees…
I am Tom Bombadill
Can't ever stand still
There's too many Creatures to see.
I've many songs to sing
And a wife in the stream
Whistle a diddle-diddle to call me.
Oh I'll never give up the mountain.
Or say I'm the oldest alive.
For you'll probably see
A hobbit in a tree…
And it won't even matter [whistle] … how high!
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9. |
One Note Concerto in G
01:06
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10. |
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11. |
Jingle Bards
02:13
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Jingle bards jingle bards
jingle bang jingle all the way
broken strings smashed autoharps and recorders that don't play
Dashing to a gig
I think we're running late
See that waitress there
She thinks that we're both baked
She tells her manager
That's why that we were late
But we're new to this gigging game
And now we'll never play
A Celtic festival
Trad musics what they want
But we play Danny boy
And rebel songs for fun
The director calls us out
But we don't really care
We'll play the music that we want
Though Jedi might be there
Now at a Christmas gig
You may think that we're joyous
But were not Santa Claus
With a baggie full of gifts
We play songs serious
You'll never see us smile
Ah that's not true. We're having fun
And laughing all the while
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12. |
Fall of Serenity Valley
04:09
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13. |
Thorin's Eulogy
03:04
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Ah what a grand adventure
With dwarves, a dragon and gold
I tell the children and they giggle
at the splendor of memories I told
But Thorin was the enigma
A story I couldn’t unveil
He’s one that I’ll always remember
When at last I end my tale
How far we came together
Over Hills, thru woods, ‘cross streams
He made the world more beautiful
A far safer place to be
Now I'm still wrapped up in my blanket
Hoping he’ll rap on my door
To Invite me on another adventure
Because this is what friends are for.
I don’t know that I ever knew him
But I saw passion in his eyes
He inspired me, set a fire under me
At least he tried.
He told me how I moved him
To a merrier world, he sighed
Where food and cheer elude him
Then he died.
I can’t believe he died
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14. |
My Irish Valentine
05:27
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15. |
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She didn’t need a shot of scotch or even a pint of beer
To have fun and face life without any fears
Stayed in control though the spirits flowed through her veins
And didn’t have to sober much because she used restraint
Long time ago, in the nowhere part of space
Rey came of age, decided she would be a drinking ace
BB8 would mix her drinks at morning and at night
So she learned to drink responsibly as a pilot for the light
She flew a ship from Jakku, with a drinking plan
Though she had no Jedi master to take her by the hand
Drank the Order and the Rebels, under tables through the rim,
Her search for a Jedi drinking coach was looking rather grim.
She drank down Kylo Ren, and after she awoke,
Mini-Vader lost his lunch, his hair held back by Snoke
She finally found The Last Jedi hiding in AA
He drank too much, swore off spirits, refusing to help Rey.
Rey took his drinking guides and faced Kylo once again
It was a draw, but she knew, next time that she would win
One thing that she learned from Luke and unconscious Kylo Ren
It’s that Women hold their liquor far better than do men.
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Brobdingnagian Bards Austin, Texas
Brobdingnagian Bards (pron. brAHb'ding-näg-EE-en) are The Original Celtic Renaissance music duo. They take traditional Irish and Scottish songs and give them a comedic twist. Their unique brand of music on the autoharp, recorder, and mandolin put Austin, Texas on the Celtic music map and made them one of the most-popular Celtic groups online. ... more
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